Sub-Nirvana

Anger is definitely the worst and most useless feeling around. Say for the small chance that you're an MMA fighter, in that case, rage on! Anywho, the reason I bring this up is because the past couple nights have helped me realize how much I really just don't enjoy the feeling. 

My brother's birthday was just a couple days ago. We celebrated a tad before it though because it was the only time I would be in town. I feel so significant in moments when my position in life matters enough to change the dates of other people's celebrations. He can be quite the little bugger sometimes. Honestly I've never met anyone who tests me more, but there aren't too many things I can do except give him a well deserved, loving noogie to the noggin and call it a day. Anywho, this week I find myself in a state of sub-nirvana.

A lot of lovely things keep happening around me. You know those days when it feels as though everyone around you is non-stop smiling? Like everyone just woke up, on a mission from God, to tell as many good jokes as possible! Just the loveliest day. I felt so chipper, I stopped by Tay's to say "Allo!" and give a big ole' hermit's hug on my way out. I'm a big hugger anyway but context is everything. Like when a cop says "Freeze!" and Mr. Freeze says "Freeeeeeeze!" Anywho, today several things worth remark happened.

I was among the super-loud chairs and massive framed windows by the café. Sitting for no real reason. I was actually semi-late to class but sometimes, I just want to sit. So as I was enjoying the assortment of scents from everyone's lukewarm cups, gazing at the dead tree, and the really big tree subsiding it's macabre tones, I saw the person I like to call Silvercap. Not a clever/pretty/witty/sensible name that makes people go "she must be quite the bombshell!" Nor does it give undertones of my relation to her, but the complete reason for it is that, I, for the life of me, CAN-NOT-REMEMBER-HER-NAME! (and her hair is really, reeeeeaally blonde)


Last semester in psych, my buddy and I spoke everyday to the same two girls(Talls and Silvercap). Yes, the other one was incredibly tall to say the least, but that's beside the point! Even after speaking to her(Silvercap) daily for an entire semester, I find myself still a little bit sheepish and far too meek to ask if she likes sitting down and coffee smells. So I continued sitting, in as bold a fashion as I think a boy could, stared and thought of what to say, with zero real intent to even share eye contact. A lovely day, but not that lovely(sub-nirvana). The questions that it gives me now are, will I be recognized? If I tell her a joke will it be silly and furthermore, do I even know any?! I resolve to give myself these answers, in the only way. And it begins with saying "Hey."


Thank you